I hate to say it but having anxiety is like having butterflies in your stomach at all times, diarrhea without the pepto, nauseous without the throw up, and having chest pain without the heart attack.
Why does anxiety even exist? It’s hard to breathe and heaviness just sits on your chest, it wakes you at anytime of day or even night, doesn’t allow you to rest or sleep, and doesn’t even allow you to take control of your own mind. Anxiety is legit and its the worst, I mean there could be days where you can be so happy and boom anxiety. Why? well thats the best thing of anxiety you never know when it happens.
Today was one of those days, I woke up at 1am with chest heaviness that I couldn’t even sleep, I just keep tossing and turning and it was hard to go back to sleep. It was so bad that I just decided to take my anxiety medication to just make it stop. Finally, I went to bed at 3am, when my work alarm wakes me up at 615am.
Having anxiety is not having control of anything, not even of who you are, it takes a toll on you physically, emotionally, and spiritually. You feel defeated and even feel insecure.
One time I was out and about with my husband of course just spending some quality time and boom once again an anxiety attack. He kept asking me why I had an anxiety attack but sometimes you dont even know. Its annoying, because you don’t know when its coming it is just a presence that you feel and it takes over.
Oh anxiety how I wish you didn’t exist, I wish you didn’t show up when I’m having my good days, and I wish you didn’t show up when I’m trying to de stress or unwind.